<wants to create random campus fliers and ridiculous class announcements>
... the department of nuclear weapons presents the 2nd Captain MAD Mike lecture series featuring fissionable material harvesting, optimum blast impact physics, and a hands on lab at the research peninsula. Grade based on attendance and handling of unstable Uranium.
... Frat Sigma Gamma Eta (ςγη) will be meeting with Sorority Tau Alpha Chi (ταχ) will be mixing for the annual ςγηταχ mixer at the lower campus lawn Smarch 7th at 5 PM.
... a farewell party will be held at the Theater Departments Ryan Building of Furry Costuming, as the building will soon be demolished to make way for the CommieCorp Building of Industrial Disaster Design.
... Announcement of New Class Offering: FENG 101, Basics of Warp Field Propulsion and Metaphysics. For more information, inquire with the Ferruccio Engineering Department Office in that massive monstrosity of a building casting a shadow on the entire University.
... Espilae is now offering Classical Religious Studies courses in the evening! Covered material includes Nimbusology, Subminite Animalism, and Ancient Philosophies of the Stone Critters.
... Missing: One Baro Pod. If found, please call 555-555-5555.
... KEGGER FRIDAY NIGHT! Behind the Fine Arts Building. Featuring the Annual Baro Pod challenge to see who can drink an entire Baro Pod worth of beer! Last years' champion, the Nimbusian Belch Breath, will be returning.
